This is for all the NORMAL girls

I've spent too long trying to figure out whether I am normal or not...so in the interest of time, I'm going to redefine. NORMAL girls think too much about the boys they like. NORMAL girls spend just a little too much money on hair and face 'product'. NORMAL girls want a man who is willing to commit to just them and they don't REALLY mean it when they say that it's cool if you don't call for 3 days. NORMAL girls will eat another piece of cake after the party guests have left...using their hands because all the forks are dirty and who cares, because it was MY birthday anyway. NORMAL girls have a board of directors for every relationship they embark on...and they tell their board of directors EVERYTHING that he says and does and doesn't do. NORMAL girls will hate their girl friend's boyfriend but will genuinely be happy for her when he does something sweet. NORMAL girls go to therapy and cry alone in their rooms from that cosmic lonliness that has nothing to do with whether or not you have people around. NORMAL girls play dress up on a saturday night when they don't have a date...again. NORMAL girls get guilted into taking "sweat and die" classes at the gym because some stupid assed salesman told her that she had a jutting neck. NORMAL girls have good jobs, but are still bored sometimes.