Friday, October 24, 2008

I'm normal and regular.

I'm tired of everyone appearing to have these fabulous lives full of weekend shenanigans and hip everything. I read your blogs. I'm sure that I like you in RL. But maybe sometimes my life is all about how much fiber I consumed instead of the wild hijinx of single life. So today, I want you to know that I ate 10 grams of fiber (mostly from fruit and these Fiberone bars that I love) and almost (working on it as we speak) 1600 ml of water. Tomorrow will be more of the same. Oh, and a coerced theatrical experience in which I finally! see the musical CATS...in korean. Shoot me now.

Friday, October 10, 2008

words are cheap and I like a good bargain...

but seriously, "hubby"? That word is like the nasty stained underpants at the bottom of the DI bucket that you pick up accidently and then hurl across the room when you realize what it is. Don't take it! EVEN IF IT"S FREE! That stain will NOT come out. Hubby. Blech!

I can't think of a less attractive word to call the person that you've decided should be the father of your children or at least the payer of your bills.

actually, I think I should just start a comprehensive list of unapproved words here for the sake of posterity...

NOTE: while not inherently evil, each of these words use alone or together in certain contextual situations or combinations (ie. pork panties) can ignite a physical reaction that may or may not include chills, projectile vomit, explosive swearing and whimpering.

moist
ointment
boil
panty
pork
pustule
hock
cubicle (thanks alie, now it always makes me think of pubicle, and who likes the word pubicle?)
bladder
misanthropic
delve
menses
lark
mercantile (can't really watch Little House On The Prairie anymore, stupid Olsens.)
blossoming (no reference to joey lawrence and mayim bailik vehicle of the early 90's)


There's more, but I won't really remember until after I punch you. Accidently.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Little Mexico



It's concert time and I'm in the business of creating the finest singing Korean Mexicans you ever heard. Check out my gang.