Deliciousness. Weirdness. Embarrassness.

DELICIOUSNESS: I've found my favorite. It's called Dalkkalbi 닭갈비 (which means literally chicken ribs) and it's spicy and delicious and they give you these little aprons to wear... Lumina caught me in a total state of Koreaness...hand covering my mouth while I talk on the cell phone during dinner while someone is cooking our food at the table. The only problem is that my clothes match...



WEIRDNESS:

I'm acquiring a really nice collection of funny english t-shirts which I will bring to America to give as gifts to my friends who will find them amusing. One is all about Treedom (also known as freedom) and the other is all about Crossdressing. This one, "Let's play naked twister, Linda" has been my favorite so far, but I just couldn't spend more than 10 dollars for a gag

And finally, EMBARRASSNESS: I wrote this little story for an email to a friend, but I've since decided to share it for the good of the people... The more you know....

Last night I had a run in with a korean toilet seat that was kind of embarrassing/amusing. They have these crazy "do it all" robotic toilet seats that warm themselves and wash themselves and squirt water in all kinds of places...and I have never figured out how to flush it without going manual...so last night in the restaurant, I decided to try...BAD idea. After I was all done with everything (re: pants pulled up) I pushed a pink button that looked like it should flush something and watched with wonder as this little tube come out like a robotic arm. My wide-eyed intrigue was replaced with wide-eyed terror as the robotic arm started to shoot water up and out of the toilet in a steady stream that first soaked the entire back of my pants and then hit the toilet stall door and dripped down all over the floor. In a moment of panic, I did the only thing I thought I could...I put the toilet seat down, but the squirting tube didn't stop and all it did was create a fountain explosion from inside the bowl. I thought I heard someone outside the bathroom stall say something about raining(which in retrospect was probably not real since everyone was korean), and I started to laugh in that sort of embarrassed, "holy crap what do I do now? This is insanity." way...

Deciding that no one needed a 5 minute bidet experience to feel truly clean, I began to wonder if there was another button that I was supposed to hit to make the water stop...and there was. I then tried to inconspicuously mop the floor with toilet paper and dry off my pants a bit and after a short but fervent prayer that no one would notice the pee-looking water stains on my pants, I emerged a new woman, unceremoniously initiated into the world of the Korean Toilet Seat.

Makin' Hippies

Well, it's fieldtrip time again and this month we thought we would teach the kids a little bit about a nice little slice of alternative culture...we took them to a natural fabric dying co-op. I didn't really know what to expect, but was really pleasantly surprised, not only by the fact that this little guy, we'll call him T, sat absolutely and completely still during the entire bus ride...

but also by the actual coolness of the place. It had all the charm of an old commune full of people chomping on organic, home grown vegetables and washing their clothes in the stream combined with the weirdness of Korea... This is our host who told the kids in English to call him Uncle Jonas. If I forced to pick a Western hippy name, I think Jonas is a pretty good bet.

And these are the fruits of our labor. Bandanas. Soaked in all kinds of roots and flower extracts and beautifully diverse. The kids had lots of fun sticking their hands in the dye and I'm sure their parents are going to LOVE the splotches of yellow, red and blue all over their clothes. Why they didn't give us little smocks, I will never know.

This is one of my favorite students. She did the babushka thing all by herself and with her cute missing teeth, she reminds me of an ajuma. When I have kids, I will pray night and day that they are 1/2 as cool as this grinning little imp. I don't know WHY I am drawn to the overly dramatic ones???? Ahhhhhhhhh. This is my interpreter, "I" with his artwork on his head. This kid is so amazing. He can't stop talking and playing, so I asked him to be my interpreter when Uncle Jonas was talking. He concentrated so hard and did such a good job of telling me what was going on that I kind of wished all of our classes required translation...then maybe he could keep himself out of Time Out for the full 45 minutes. I'm learning that it's a real challenge to teach to each child....especially the gifted ones. Maybe that's why I spent the bulk of my lunchtimes in Jr. High in detention???? naw.....

Making organic ttak (boiled rice cakes) that evidently have some sort of green root in them. I was grateful that they boiled them at high temperatures since the kids manhandled them before I was forced to eat them for snack that day. mmmmmmmmmm...boiled green roots and rice snacks! Eat em up!

So the fieldtrip was fun and though I came home utterly exhausted as I am wont to do after herding children all day, I was really grateful when I walked in the door...

My house smelled like LILIES!!!! That's because I was able to buy 2 bunches of my favorite flowers for 6,000 won (= 6-7 bucks US). Add that to the delightful green hanging plant that I bought for 5 bucks last saturday and I think you can see that I am finally feeling settled. Plants to kill and flowers that I bought for myself. Life is so good.

PS. please note that Yo on which the plant is sitting...that is a bed for guests who may or may not ever visit me in korea...If that doesn't entice you to come see me, may I interest you in some organic bandana tiedying???

Magical Things

The 7th Hahdee pahtah (that's korean for Harry Potter) is upon us...I don't have it yet, but soon soon I will know what happens...and I'll be honest, I'm not adverse to just reading the synopsis online as soon as the world's best speed reader gets 'er done. Don't get me wrong, I still heart harry, I mean, I've been with him for 6 books, 5 movies, several blog entries and a few overnight work shift...it's just that I might be having that sort of ennui that comes with something ending. You know how you get annoyed with everyone you know right before you move so that you don't have to be sad about the end....yeah...that sort of psychological thingy.

In honor of HP, I thought I would tell you about two magical things in my life:

1. I made a tornado in a bottle! When I was a young and impressionable student, science never thrilled me, but now that I've rediscovered my inner geek (and since I am doing science on a level closer to my understanding) I'm so excited to teach it and learn all about tornados in coke bottles. woo hoo! Bring on the punnet squares!

2. I AM officially A LONG HAIRED GIRL!!!! This is truly magic. Now comes the hard part...trying not to cut it. Itchy Itchy scissor finger...

Am I the only one???

Does anyone else get anxious for no good reason? As though my body is warning me of some impending (or concurrent) event that my head has yet to wrap itself around. It's not like an anxiety ATTACK perse...just a sort of nervousness that has no explanation. Maybe this is unique to me but it still sucks.

Just Another Boring Sunday Night

Really, I shouldn't be allowed to stay in my house longer than the eight hours I require for sleep. Last sunday I blew every fuse in the building and was without electricity(and air conditioning) just long enough for me to eat all of the beef jerky out of my food storage (it's always the first to go in a state of emergency). This Sunday, I bonked my head on the open cabinet door and sustained a bloody wound. The fact that I leave cabinet doors open while cooking pancakes will not come as a surprise to anyone who knows me well...especially Crystal and Alie who were the self-appointed "follow up safety and cleaning crew" in various apartments around the U.S. What might be surprising is the calmness with which I handled said trauma.

I fell to the floor, cradled my head while cursing the designers of THIS CABINET DOOR and tried to imagine the meeting in which this torture device was approved for manufacture. "I have an idea! Let's make it metal, with a sharp razor-like edge and put it in a tiny space like a kitchenette in Korea...surely, it will be the toast of Asia!!!" I would also like to point out with some irony that the cabinet door is the one emblazoned with the virtuous words, "Patience" and "Balance" neither of which were present when I muttered more than a few other CHOICE words at the cabinet.

When I saw the blood, I calmly got a towel and applied it to my head, got some shoes (choosing the brown sparkly ones just in case I had to go to the hospital) and went to Cherie and Regan's apartment to have them look at the top of my head which is surprisingly difficult to view even with 2 mirrors. The funny part is that my hair just kind of looked like I tried to dye it...fresh blood on blond hair looks strikingly sassy instead of gruesome.



We determined no emergency room was necessary but as I sit hear writing and nerdily blogging about my stupidity and subsequent brain damage, I have a massive headache. Maybe next week, I can start a fire just to keep it interesting.

ps. Lumina said this post should be called "Ninny Gets A Headwound" and while it made me laugh it reminded me too much of this SNL skit from when I was a teenager called
Massive Headwound Harry...does anyone else remember this HILARIOUS skit circa 1989?

Committment Issues

This coming weekend is the Mud Festival somewhere in Korea. I was supposed to go. I reserved a spot on the bus, I paid my money, I told the primary president that I would be gone for the whole weekend...and then I decided to read the David O. Mackay Relief Society Manual and guess who's totally mormon and NOT going to the Mud Festival now?????

Here's the thing. When I was in college, a band that I really really really wanted to see was coming to Philly and playing on a Sunday night. A boy that I really really really wanted to makeout with wanted to go to the show too and we planned to go together. I'm not so into math but still the equation was compelling...rockshow + beautiful man = Bliss. But something didn't feel right. I believe in God and I believe that Sunday is the sabbath day...a day to do God things and sacrafice your own desires in order to completely dedicate yourself to the things that really matter, like service and family and thoughtful worship and study. The beautiful man was also religious and when we talked about it, he left it to me to make the decision to go or not to go to the show. Somewhere from deep inside, I mustered the strength to say ONE TIME, "OK, then let's not go." and that's when it started. We didn't go and subsequently, I have missed many an amazing event, show, makeout in the name of "keeping the sabbath day holy".

The mud festival is an organized weekend trip with a schedule and such. Evidently, we take a bus and we flop in the mud and eat food and hang out on the beach and come back sunday night. Everyone who has ever gone has the coolest photos and talks about how fun it is. The festival in and of itself is not the problem...it's the fact that I will miss church and be rolling around in dirt with half naked boys (sigh.) when I am supposed to be taking the sacrament. The talk that I read by the prophet was very straight forward and I felt something when he advised us that keeping the sabbath holy was not just about NOT doing things but also about being where we should be on sunday, like church. Of course, we will not be able to go to church every sunday during our lives, but I felt this time it was preventable and that maybe I should find another way to go to the festival and come home saturday night. Turns out that wasn't so possible...and so, Lumina and I cancelled (she needed to work on painting).

THe truth? I was actually kind of annoyed at myself for thinking about NOT going...I mean, how religious AM I? and honestly, does being mormon and committing to it require me to give up all semblence of rockstardom? Am I doomed to be milquetoasty, boring, unexperienced and lame? And the reality hit me: I care more about God things than mudfestivals and maybe just maybe somewhere along the line of my spiritual progression, I am going to stop caring about celebrity gossip and fashion magazines and pop culture and my hair all in the name of growth. Ok, probably not about the hair, but maybe...just maybe...