Thursday, July 26, 2007

Deliciousness. Weirdness. Embarrassness.

DELICIOUSNESS: I've found my favorite. It's called Dalkkalbi 닭갈비 (which means literally chicken ribs) and it's spicy and delicious and they give you these little aprons to wear... Lumina caught me in a total state of Koreaness...hand covering my mouth while I talk on the cell phone during dinner while someone is cooking our food at the table. The only problem is that my clothes match...



WEIRDNESS:

I'm acquiring a really nice collection of funny english t-shirts which I will bring to America to give as gifts to my friends who will find them amusing. One is all about Treedom (also known as freedom) and the other is all about Crossdressing. This one, "Let's play naked twister, Linda" has been my favorite so far, but I just couldn't spend more than 10 dollars for a gag




And finally, EMBARRASSNESS: I wrote this little story for an email to a friend, but I've since decided to share it for the good of the people... The more you know....
Last night I had a run in with a korean toilet seat that was kind of embarrassing/amusing. They have these crazy "do it all" robotic toilet seats that warm themselves and wash themselves and squirt water in all kinds of places...and I have never figured out how to flush it without going manual...so last night in the restaurant, I decided to try...BAD idea. After I was all done with everything (re: pants pulled up) I pushed a pink button that looked like it should flush something and watched with wonder as this little tube come out like a robotic arm. My wide-eyed intrigue was replaced with wide-eyed terror as the robotic arm started to shoot water up and out of the toilet in a steady stream that first soaked the entire back of my pants and then hit the toilet stall door and dripped down all over the floor. In a moment of panic, I did the only thing I thought I could...I put the toilet seat down, but the squirting tube didn't stop and all it did was create a fountain explosion from inside the bowl. I thought I heard someone outside the bathroom stall say something about raining(which in retrospect was probably not real since everyone was korean), and I started to laugh in that sort of embarrassed, "holy crap what do I do now? This is insanity." way...

Deciding that no one needed a 5 minute bidet experience to feel truly clean, I began to wonder if there was another button that I was supposed to hit to make the water stop...and there was. I then tried to inconspicuously mop the floor with toilet paper and dry off my pants a bit and after a short but fervent prayer that no one would notice the pee-looking water stains on my pants, I emerged a new woman, unceremoniously initiated into the world of the Korean Toilet Seat.

11 comments:

Sara McOllie said...

Way to take one for the team back home! Okay, can someone explain the difference of the pink "bidet" setting and the blue "spray" setting. Aren't they the same thing? Plus, I realy like the pictures on the buttons.

Marie said...

That blue button is HILARIOUS. It is clearly the international symbol for "refreshing butt spray." Or maybe the blue button is a refreshing *cleavage* spray and the pink one is the traditinal bidet?

My mother collects toilet paper from different countries, but I think pictures of funky toilets is much better. And funny toilet stories, too. Thanks for sharing. :)

Dainon said...

Holy wow. That final chapter should have been called FUNNINESS. Because it was.

Anonymous said...

Marie, thank you for "refreshing butt spray". I did a full on bust up in my cubicle and then had to explain to coworkers.

JonnyBoy in PDX

PSYCHMOM said...

You need to call me and give me your address. I hear you don't check your email.

Tamara said...

You are the best! Thank you for sharing!

Rachel said...

I love the restaurant picture. There is so much going on there.

caroline said...

i love your life.

PSYCHMOM said...

I'm testing something here.

PSYCHMOM said...

Ok, so my test failed. I just wanted to give you the link to my blog (which really isn't as cleaver as this one). www.Thepsychmom.blogspot.com

PSYCHMOM said...

i meant clever, ok, clever..