Monday, April 12, 2010

Blue Ray and Jolene

Meet Ray.Get it?
Blue Ray.
Named after Ray LaMontagne because what's more blue than Ray?
It's also apropos because my GPS is named Jolene thanks to SB who was once so upset by the sheer number of songs written about women with names ending in ENE that I think he might have burst a blood vessel. In the song of the same name (Jolene, in case you forgot by the time I actually finished my run on sentence) by Mr. LaMontagne, Ray sings, "Jolene...I ain't about to go's too late" which is what my car often sings to the GPS when I refuse to listen to her crazy garbled directionals.

Ray has a few features that the Go-Cart didn't even know existed. There are these buttons that you push and the windows go UP AND DOWN all by themselves!!!! There's a little hole where I can plug in The Best iPod Ever. And here's another surprise: Oh no, the sun is shining in my eyes! What do I do????? (NB pushes a button and a little trap door opens revealing SUNGLASSES hidden in the trap door) Amazing. Cruise control. Alloy wheels. And best of all- four very grown up doors where people who ride in Ray can just GET IN without having to push, pull and duck through the front door. I almost don't know how to breathe when I'm cruise controlling down the highway.

The most important thing for you to remember about Ray is that I did it all by mineself!! I bought this car from a dealership. I did lots of research. I read lots of reviews. I talked to many a dealer and acted appropriately paranoid (so much so that one pushy dealer asked condescendingly, "is this your first car, honey?") There were a few moments of angst in which I was angry that I had been thrust into the car buying market to fend for myself among the sharks and creepies. But in the end, it was thoroughly empowering to buy a car. A few favorite phrases that I cultivated in my newly empowered state?

NB: George. I like you. You seem like a good guy and have a great sense of humor. I want to buy a car from you. I know I'm going to buy a nissan versa today. I can either buy it from you, or I can drive to Maryland and buy it from them. Don't make me go to Maryland, George.

NB: 6% apr is not good enough. You want me to drive out the door with this car today? Do better.

NB: Is this car spider proof?

Road Trip to Provo, anyone???


Marianne & Clayton said...

If you wanna pop on through middle Michigan I would totally road trip to Provo with you. Well, me and Eleanor. Maybe not the magic trip you were hoping for. We pack alot of treats though!

Stella said...

I am SO there! Road trip for sure!

As someone who will be purchasing her second car (in a foreign country and a foreign tongue) this is very empowering for me. I had my first car (Golde--like Tevye's wife in Fiddler) for 9 years...sigh, she now belongs to my sister in America.

Nancy said...

I just read this and realized that you named your car after Ray LaMontagne. That practically makes me weep inside--in the same delicious way that all of his songs do.