Stories I Will (probably not) Tell My Children: Part 2

Once I Had To Chose The Right and Probably Failed

One cold Costco evening, K and I were hauling bulk items back to our respective homes via bus. With the windows all fogged up on the bus, we had nothing to look at but the people. One of the people was a particularly attractive Korean man. I'm sure it was me who said, "Um, he's hot." at which moment, said Korean man looked over at us with raised eyebrows making it very clear that he spoke PERFECT english. (well, enough english to know "hot"). We giggled in horror and reminded ourselves silently that EVERYONE in Korea speaks english. When we disembarked and parted ways, K to the subway and I to another bus stop, I noticed that our bus friend was going in the same direction as me. We stood awkwardly at the light waiting to cross the street ( I pretended I didn't see him...a feat of no small accomplishment) and then stood awkwardly at the bus stop, again pretending I didn't see him.

Just as I was trying to figure out how I could pretend not to see him if we got on the same bus, something that has NEVER happened to me in my two years in Korea happened...bus friend leaned forward and started to hit on me (ok, so really he just started to talk to me, but let me have this one, ok?) Right when he was about to ask for my business card, the christmas bus appeared.

This bus is the mythical blue 470 from gangnam to jongno...bedazzled for two glorious months out of each year with sparkles, spangles and all manner of lights. I have dreamt about riding the christmas bus for about as long as I've dreamt about being talked to by a hot korean man on the streets of Seoul. And of course the fates chose to converge in a cruel twist at that very moment, making me choose between the two????? Well of course, we know which one I chose...as evidenced by the fact that I am sitting here on a Saturday night typing this story instead of drinking hot vanilla with my namja chingu. hrmmmph.

Once I Saw Korean Transvestites and Unicorns All In The Same Night

After a rousing performance of "The Rocky Horror Show" all in Korean, (a taste for mature bilingual audiences only ) in which they cleverly captured the essence of Dr. Frankenfurter (and had a funny little joke about the name Brad sounding like bread as pronounced by Koreans)...we stumbled upon an icesculpture exhibit outside taehangno. There were unicorns and iceslides. There were no other adults on the iceslide. And there were potholes. But it was lovely anyway.Once I Played Blackjack and Lost 5 Billion Dollars

This is Chansoo explaining the rules of blackjack and the value of this coin. He looks harmless doesn't he?

This is before it got ugly.Soon enough, I was all out of coins. I'm sure with my general dislike of round, flat, monetary thingys, this turn of events will not surprise you. J was the highroller of the evening. She swears she knows nothing of card games and sharking, but I heard her singing "The Gambler" quietly under her breath. Don't lie, J.When the chips are out, you've got to do a show. Some people chose to define that rather liberally.(picture omitted because I've already upset my grandma with that Rocky Horror stuff)In the end, everything was just fine. Fully clothed and just fine.Once I Worked At A Place Where Shoes Are In The Hallway and Children Are In The Closets.

This is T & J's version of playing with the cardboard box instead of the toy that came in it. We were supposed to be making a very cool dragon costume, but they spent the bulk of drama school sitting in the closet shaking tubes of sand and glitter. Sigh. So it goes.