Wednesday, October 05, 2005

hot flashes and weather toes

Today one of my coworkers told me that I am turning into an old lady. At approximately 4pm today, I had my first hot flash. Yesterday it was raining and my newly minted arthritis was in full bloom. I'm waiting for the gray hair and sour breath to finish me off.

Actually, I think the hot flash was caused by several things, none of which is "The Change of Life". My best friend's mom, who is a beautiful nut, always makes fun of skinny girls who are always cold, belting out this little mantra whenever someone skinny requires a sweater: "I'm so skinny and I'm so cold (while hugging herself and wrinkling her nose in cute skinny girl fashion), so cold because I'm soooooooooo skinny." Al and I laugh laugh laugh and join in the fun. Maybe it's the weight watchers, but this morning I woke up and I was sooooooo cold. It's only october and it's only moderately cold outside...but I wore a skinny girl cold sweater...turtle neck wool jcrew number....and I was cold all morning, but by afternoon I was flush and feverish...ready to peel off the sweater and go to web-ex meetings in my skivvies with a devil may care attitude. I had to change my mantra from, "I'm so skinny and So cold" to "Get this damn sweater off me, I'm not made for such blasting heat and if I don't get a fan going, I'm going to roast like a goat on a spit."...All illusions shattered. I don't get to be that girl quite yet.

I also think that I was having heat flashes because of my new medication...which my doctor assures me, WILL turn off my ability to recognize when I am full. His advice for being successful on WW while still quelling my "disease that will be named later" with buckets of prednisone? Resist the urge to GRAZE. Are you kidding me???? RESIST THE URGE TO GRAZE!!! yeah, that's really easy. I've only been struggling with that one since BIRTH. Did I mention roasting like a GOAT on a spit? Goats GRAZE. SO I've decided to blame everything on the medication. Heat Flashes, etc.

The only good news is that in the future with my new weather toes and storm hands, also a product of the "auto-immune process" that is my new legacy...I'll be able to tell when cold weather is a-coming and will hopefully dress appropriately for hot flashes on those days.

PS. TO all would be psychologists who do not think it appropriate for me to mock my new medical excitement...if I don't talk about it and laugh about it, you will have to be the one who holds my head over the toilet while I vomit from excessive crying. I mean, the kind with hick-ups and shallow crying breath. NOT pretty. Be glad I'm laughing...and still typing.


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Kirsten J said...


I laughed heartily out loud at your grazing goat part. I needed it. For the first time in well, ever, I actually can say LOL.

lovestrong said...

I'll hold your head over the toilet as long as I get another one of those yummy cinnammon graham cracker ice cream thingies. them was mmmmmm good.

Adam said...

I hate skinny people that think because I'm fat I have no right to complain about being cold. Skinny people don't seem to have realized that fat is UNDER our skin, and not meant to keep our skin from getting cold, it's meant to keep our core temperature stable. My skin still get's cold, and when I complain about being cold, I'm not saying that my skeletal temperature is dangerously low. Why does this piss me off so? Freakin' skinnies!

Anonymous said...


'm totally in your ward and I found this blog through the ward blog page thingie. I get hot flashes too. And I'm not even on any medication. But maybe it's because I'm 30 and getting pretty close to menopause.



Ninny Beth said...

yeah, I hear 30 is the new 60 T.

Next time I see you heat flashing in RS, I'll come fan you!

melissa said...

RESIST THE URGE TO GRAZE!!! yeah, that's really easy. I've only been struggling with that one since BIRTH.

this seriously made me laugh out loud. i totally know how you feel. thanks for writing -- i do enjoy your posts and think i will become a regular reader! :)

(i have recently left the blogger fold, while my blog is still up, i now use livejournal. if you're interested in reading me, im